It is so nice to share

Well Megan and Easton are feeling much better. Easton still has a bit of a cough but he is all smiles. He lost a little weight with this sickness so we are on the job to fatten him back up! Megan is smiling and laughing as usual. Still drooling enough to fill up Lake Mead.....
 Raegan on the other hand is not doing so well. She was up most of the night with coughing fits. She absolutely does not like her nose being sucked out with the suction machine but she tolerates it very well. I only use the bulb syringe attachment so she really doesn't have to much to complain about. Although I did put it to my nose once to see what it felt like and it was a bit of a rush. Having the air sucked out of your nose is quite a different experience. So, I guess I am as proud of her progress as I always am! We did have a trip to Shriner's with Raegan last week that I am still needing to blog about. When I have more time to sit and type I will, but for now Raegan is very demanding. A bit like her sister Hannah when she gets sick!

Fight!

We are in a battle to beat the respitory illnesses! Megan started the fight with some badmouthed germ, always dissin her and puttin her down. She fought diligently for the whole day but was worn out and that nasty little bug got the best of her. Easton decided to come in for the save but got taken out as well. Poor little Raegan is just a bystander but alas, she was also attacked.
So we have a chorus of coughs and a trio of drippy noses to contend with now. Yo, you'd better watch out you nasty bugs with your bad attitudes and your bullying, my trifecta are superheros, with awesome, kick your butt superpowers, they just take after the Yankees and prefer to come from behind! Meanwhile I'll just keep the suction machine on my hip! I'm pretty bad too ya know! I liken my self to Laura Croft. hahahaha, Oh, that one brought me to tears, goodness!
Thank You for all your well wishes and concern and prayers. They are very powerful and make all the difference to the world to me and my little munchkins. Love ya! xoxo

Megan's woes

Megan gave me a bit of a scare when she decided to get sick yesterday. Not much if your child doesn't have immune problems but a big deal if they do. I know when Megan is really not feeling well because she won't smile. Despite my best efforst to eek a smile out of her it just won't happen if she is feeling sick. So needless to say she spent a lot of time in the tub yesterday with hydro-steam therapy, it always seems to do the trick. And so it is the case this time. She is not completely out of the woods yet but she is smiling and that tells me she is on the upward mend! Megan is back in the tub today for some more therapy in hopes that we have "nipped this in the bud" as good ol Don Knotts would have said it.

Acceptance

I am finding there are many stages to acceptance. Accepting what my life is at this moment seems to come and go also. I am also finding that I go through the many stages of acceptance with my children many times over. With each new thing they face I go through the stages again. Even when nothing dramatic happens I go through the stages. I have been struggling with sadness the past few days. Just about anything and everything brings me to tears. My mind has been weighing heavily on the losses our little rhizokids group have suffered in just the past year. I have only been involved in this group for the past 2 years. It took me 7 years to start seriously looking. I was paralyzed by fear, one of the stages of acceptance. With each loss I look at my own three little RCDP children and I think about when it will be my turn. If it wasn't such a selfish thought I would so wish that I would be taken before my children just because I have felt the fringes of death with them, I am afraid of the pain and suffering it will bring. So I cling tighter to them at times, and I bury myself in housework at times, I lose myself in a movie or story sometimes. But it seems lately it is getting harder and harder. I am trying to stop running from my demons, but this is one I do not want to face. No parent should have to bury their child! It is unnatural. There are days when my anticipated grief really does get the better of me. I know what to say to myself, I've heard it all before. Live for the day, you never know what the future brings......yada yada. Not to dismiss these saying as naught, because I know that they are completely true. But there are days, when knowing your children will die before you if all goes right, when sadness just gets the best of me and I give in to it's dark embrace. I am thinking of making an "in memory" video to try and give me some focus on this scary subject. There are days, quite a lot lately, when I feel like I am on a rollercoaster of ups and downs all the while waiting for the ride to be destroyed, knowing it could happen at any moment. I am trying really hard to learn to live in the present. In the now, as the book I am reading says. Life is a very interesting journey is it not?

A+ grade from the dentist!

Easton was all smiles when the dentist gave him the thumbs up on his surgery checkup. No more swollen, painful or bleeding gums! He is starting to handle his teeth brushing a lot better now too now that it doesn't hurt so much. After canceling 2 times for is much needed tooth surgery, he is a much happier munchkin now that it is finally done!