My Alphabet of Gratitude...Letter L is for Legs

When I was born my legs were a bit troubled. I had club feet. I had to wear casts on my legs when I was just a baby and then I graduated into corrective shoes with bars that ran up my legs. I don't remember any of this, all of what I know my mom told me. I still have the shoes though, I look at them often and think about what my life would be like if it hadn't been for the technology that corrected them.
I remember running a lot as a child. I would love to hang from the bars at the school playground and would make a mad dash for them a recess so that I could. I would hang from monkey bars, trees, bunkbeds, just about anything I could wrap my legs around. I loved to jump on trampolines and of course I would dance, mostly when people weren't looking, but I LOVED to dance, still do actually. I'm not what the world would call good, but I enjoy it.
I really enjoy watching people dance, I love the movements their legs can make and how graceful and easy they make it seem. I enjoy watching the olympics on television and seeing all the perfect athletic bodies run and swim and jump. Beautiful bodies doing beautiful things.
I remember as a young girl, about 10 or so I stepped on a plate glass window that was laying down on two blocks, I didn't see it. It cut my legs pretty bad. I still have the scars. Every movement I made with my legs hurt for days. I felt like a big hurt leg. It was awful.
I've used my legs to hike, work out, run, dance, tip toe, walk, skip, and twirl. I never appreciated any of these things until I had my Megan, Easton and Raegan. Their legs don't work like the rest of ours do. Their knees are pretty big and stiff. Megan's and Easton's hips are dislocated. They will never walk, run, dance, skip, hike or twirl. I have learned that in a situation such as mine, with half of my kids being disabled, it is better to be realistic with a dash of hope. Do I work on making Raegan stand? Of course I do. Do I ever really expect her to do it on her own? No I don't. They will never use their legs in the way that the majority of us do. They have made me appreciate all my legs do for me in a way I never have before. I can only imagine how incredibly difficult my life would be if I had to go without me legs. Could I do it? Probably. Would I want to? Absolutely not.
I put their sister Hannah in dance class. I want her to celebrate her legs. I want her to celebrate her ability to use them. She does so beautifully. She is so young, I know she doesn't fully appreciate their value but I do. I watch her dance and it is hard not to cry. It is a bitter sweetness. Tears of joy and sadness fall from my eyes at the same time. Raegan will never point her toes. Megan will never do the splits. Easton will never run the bases during a game. I am a person who prides herself in seeing the glass as half full instead of half empty though so I do appreciate all they can do with their legs. Easton uses them to scoot like no other. He can swim just like a little fish by just swinging his legs and hips back and forth. He finds this hilarious too. Raegan can push with her little legs so hard. She loves to kick my face and have me kiss her cute little piggies. Megan loves to have her feet rubbed and her knees played with. They do use their legs, just not in the way intended by the "normal".
I am grateful for my legs and all they do for me. I'm grateful that my children have taught me through their disabilities not to take anything for granted. Even when my legs are jumpy and restless just about every night I am thankful that I have them. I run and jump and dance for my trifecta, with my trifecta most times and they love it. My legs are their legs for the time but I look forward to the day when they have legs of their own that work the way they were intended to. I look forward to the day when I can see my little angels run and dance without me holding them, when they can run into my arms on their own accord. Until then, they can use mine.